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Waking up this morning and feeling in love with life, having hope again and being at peace pleasantly surprised me.
My storm lasted almost 6 years by being in a very toxic and abusive relationship with a Narcissistic man.
For some reason we can’t fully see what’s going on when we are caught up in “our storm.” We have to remove ourselves, get distance and some time in between and then we start to see everything as clear as day.
Now I kick myself for not leaving sooner!
Fuck toxic relationships and bad men! I have flushed my shitty marriage down the toilet and wiped well so that there are little if any traces of its existence.
What I am feeling now, today is how life is supposed to be. I am at peace, free from abuse and finally feel optimistic about my future again!
Something else that I feel is ironic about being in an unhealthy relationship is that those closest to you can see issues and problems and if they voice their concerns most times it falls on deaf ears. We don’t want to believe the truth and try to deny that there are major problems. We don’t want to seem incompetent, weak or that we make bad decisions for ourselves. Our pride is at stake.
Love and really good sex can blind you but I think we get in our own way more than being blinded. I think for me, I selectively and intentionally chose to put invisible blinders on (you know like the things they have horses wear sometimes). I disregarded listening to my intuition and pushed away the red flags that were slapping me in the face. I blame my ego!
Our ego messes us up and leads up into situations or keeps us someplace where it’s not in our own best interest.
This is my third marriage and I am only 43, so I am no expert at love and relationships, but this time I invested all of myself. I was “All In.” By doing this I exposed myself (not in the sense that you may be thinking like a flasher, come on now ☺️). I let myself be wide-open and vulnerable and I gave away most of my power in my relationship. These were HUGE mistakes.
Over time, I grew more resentful and was utterly miserable and was just plain tired of being taken advantage of and mistreated. I knew something had to change, but it had to come from within me!
I decided that my best choice was to leave my marriage and it’s the single best decision that I’ve made in years (within my personal life).
So I am reveling in my current reality because I listened to what really matters and that’s what my soul needs. Deep down my authentic self was stifled but I let it happen. I made some very poor decisions these past 6 years and I’ve learned some very hard lessons (that I will work hard to never repeat again!)
If you are in a bad relationship and feel stuck, know that you absolutely are NOT stuck. You do have options! The real question is, what are you willing to do about your situation?
If you have red flags going off inside the pit of your stomach, you need to pay attention to those truthful warning signs.
If you don’t pay attention to those flashing signs you may crash, get badly injured and hurt or worse.
Take it from me, there IS a better life waiting for you on the other side, even if it means that you are on your own and single again.
I’ve seen first-hand how one of the wonderful perks about getting away from something that doesn’t work, is that all of the hard work, effort and energy you put into yourself will go straight to you solely. This is a truly beautiful thing! Y.O.L.O.
Life is too short to put up with people that don’t deserve you and ones that may mistreat and take advantage of you. Put yourself first and into a healthy place that is full of real love, good people and endless opportunities.
Here’s to new beginnings! 🥂🍻🍾
I’d love to hear about your experience with your own “emotional storm.” What happened and how did you cope and if you have a story to share please make a comment below.