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Just like the United States still has a partial embargo on Cuba, right now, I have put up an official, self-enforced ban on having sex. I’m not joking!
I’m scared stiff of penises currently (Notice the pun). They cause issues and problems more often than not! I know that penises themselves aren’t to blame but the men that are attached to them are. I don’t think that all men are bad. I’m a feminist but not a man hater!
In fact, I know a few handfuls of really good men out there. I know good guys exist and that they too have a penis but my luck with intimate relationships that I’ve had with men in my adult life has been something terrible. My picker is off! I didn’t say my pecker is off, thankfully I don’t have one of those cucumber lookalikes. Come on now, get your mind outta the gutter! (Nicole 😜)
I know without a doubt that if you are a man reading this, that you are probably talking to yourself right now saying that women and their vaginas cause a lot of drama or more shit than men (and their silly penises create) but I don’t care what you think right now. Your opinions don’t count because you have a penis and they are banned, remember. Get over yourself!
Being celibate by choice is very empowering. I mention this because I think that sex can really cloud your judgment, especially when you have really good, mind-blowing sex.
For me, sex is one of the best things in the world when it’s shared with someone that I love, respect and care about and vice versa, hopefully!
I don’t do one night stands, I never have. I respect myself and my body too much to freely give this away to just anyone. I think men should pay to be with me, but I wouldn’t accept any exchange of money because I’m not a stripper or a prostitute. I don’t have big enough boobs to be one. (Just kidding around with ya!)
In the past, I’ve made men work to be with me. Sadly, I let the wrong penises in that never deserved to be with me in the first place. Having low self-esteem and not enough self-worth were the culprits.
Some days I think to myself randomly how I really wish that I could just have casual sex and not give a shit, but actually having morals, ethics and values gets in the way. (Damn it to hell!) I think I’ll keep taking the high road here.
I’m in a place in my life where I’ve cut myself off from thinking about even spending time with a new man, let alone almost any one, no matter their gender. My time is too precious to waste it on just anyone, like I’ve been doing for way too many years now.
As I’m sure you now understand, sex is one of the last things on my mind. If you have read any of my previous blog posts you’d understand where I’m at in my life and why I am thinking these things. Please get acquainted, I invite you to take a Segway. I love those things, especially the Mini-Segways! Let me get back on track here.
I’m totally fine with not getting any nookie, thus me imposing the ban and embargo on penises right now.
I still take care of myself and my needs but in other ways and for the first time in over 6 years, it feels great not being controlled or overpowered by men, sex and their penises.
Recently, I was watching an old 80’s movie and one of the female characters said that “Women use sex to get intimacy and men use intimacy to get sex.” How fucking true and right on is that statement! Wow! Huh.
And I can’t lie, I stole the phrase “penis embargo” from an episode of Friends. I found it very fitting and clever for where I’m at in my life today, so I had to use it.
To wrap this thing up and I’m not talking about a condom or a penis here, I know the title of this blog is silly, but it’s how I really feel. I’d rather be completely “out of the dating pool” than have to deal with dicks and their own agendas.
“I can see clearly now the rain is gone (the penis is gone). I can see all the obstacles in my way……. It’s gonna be a bright, bright, bright sunny shiny day.” (Taken from a great song, well except for the penis part.)
Ladies and gentlemen the penis (Elvis) has left the building!
Question: Have you ever intentionally stopped having sex, put a ban on it, or decide to be celibate? If so, why and how did it feel for you?